Man in mountain lake landscape jumping into the air

Are you holding on to negative emotions or thoughts? Do they stop you from falling asleep like a tiny little baby at night? Do you find yourself ruminating about something someone done did to ya?

It's time to let go of all of that stuff that isn't working because it is zapping your energy baby! It's keeping you from shining your light and being your amazingly beautiful self.

Ready to let go? Okay, grab a piece of paper and a pencil and play along.

Write down EVERYTHING that isn’t working, from the littlest thing to the biggest thing. Go way back into your childhood if you want. This is your chance to write down:

·      Grudges

·      Resentments

·      Regrets

·      Beating yourself up for something you did.

·      Beating yourself up for something you didn’t do.

·      Beating someone else up for something that they did or didn’t do.

·      Life being unfair

Write it ALL down.  Keep writing until you have nothing more to write.

Look at back on what you wrote and feel all the feelings this list brings up. Notice where you are feeling that negativity in your body. Notice how much of the negativity is there and yet you act like you are "fine."

The negative energy you are experiencing right now is sucking the life out of you, isn't it?  You know your time would be better spent fulfilling your purpose and your destiny. How come it is so hard to let go?  

Because we think when we forgive, we are saying that we are okay with what our the state of our current circumstances, or that we are okay with someone 'wronging" us. 

Letting go is not about rolling over and going, “hey, what you did to me is okay. Or what happened to me is okay."


How do you let go?


Rebellion against what? You've got to practice rebelling against your own ego

Sigmund Freud, the father of psychoanalysis, defined the ego as:

one of the three divisions of the psyche in psychoanalytic theory that serves as the organized conscious mediator between the person and reality especially by functioning both in the perception of and adaptation to reality

ESPECIALLY by functioning both in the perception of and adaptation to reality — hmmmmm

What that tells me is that the ego's job is to perceive reality and then adapt to it. That tells me that when the ego is involved, we are never truly dealing with reality. Reality is distance, time, and form, not perception or interpretation.

The interpretation is designed to keep us safe. That was cool back in cavewoman days but now it simply keeps us separate.

Separate from who or what?

Separate from who we really are and separate from each other.

Who are we really?

We all came from the same life force — let's call it universal consciousness — and that universal life force is pure energy and pure love.

If you and I are pure love, then can love be offended?

NO! because LOVE isn’t a thing – LOVE isn’t a physical object.

It is energy.

The only thing that gets offended is the ego — the interpretation of reality.

When you're upset, when you're upset with someone or something that's happening, you want to commit a conscious act of rebellion against your own ego, against the wrongness that you perceive was committed against the YOU you think you are, the you that isn't really you. 

Who YOU really are is the essence of your soul and that essence, that energy, that piece of God or Goddess or Buddha or Dao (whatever your belief system insert here) that love can never be offended.

Just breathe into that for a minute. Breathe in the love and breathe out those negative perceptions. Let them all go.

In our world, NOW more than ever, we need WAY MORE love and connection, not separation.

That has got to start with you having a deep connection to your soul, your source, that God-like energy that resides in each of us and allows us to simply go with the flow, instead of being offended by fiction. A fiction made up by our ego interpreting and adapting to reality.

Keep on breathing friends. Let the love in!

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About The Author

Jen Coken's picture

Jen Coken is an author, life coach, and comedian who wants to live in a world where you’re free to be yourself and achieve your soul’s purpose—a vision that has driven her work as a Coach, Speaker, Author, Comedian for more than 20 years.

Drawing on three decades of experience as a non-profit leader and grassroots organizer, Jen helps CEOs and entrepreneurs overcome their self-made limitations and do their heart’s work.

But Jen’s impact doesn’t end there: She spent six years on the Denver stand-up comedy circuit and brings a sense of humor to every topic she addresses, including the experience of coping with her mother's diagnosis and death from ovarian cancer.

Jen’s book, "When I Die, Take My Panties: Turning Your Darkest Moments into Your Greatest Gifts" chronicles that experience and shares Jen’s core message that everything that comes our way is meant to teach us about ourselves.

When she’s not crafting bestselling books or speaking to audiences around the country, you can find Jen eating Nutella by the spoonful in the nearest grocery aisle.

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